don't sweat the small stuff part 2

I stumbled upon this quote/graphic while preparing for last week's blog post. I thought it was too poignant to stick with the post and that it needed its own post!

Essentially we fix nothing by worrying. In fact, we deplete our own resources. Our strength. Our hope. Our energy. Our willpower.

The Bible says the joy of the Lord is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10). I think that it is a natural process that when we worry, we loose joy. If we think of our joy being stored (internally) in a reservoir, then it is possible to think less in terms of all or nothing but understanding that there is a filling and an emptying.  Our reservoir is emptied...or as a friend so aptly said, "our joy leaks out" when we worry.

Not to worry (haha), if your joy has been leaking out, we can easily build up our stash by reminding ourselves of God's promises, His Word and His attributes (e.g.faithful, kind, forgiving, gracious, merciful, loving).  Essentially this should be our daily position as inevitably, whether you intentionally stress over small or large things, the way life is, there is bound to be leakage, even if only just small drips, making our thought life ever so important.

So what do we do today (and everyday)....

wooosah.

 breathe. release. trust.

...and remind ourselves of how faithful our God is!

Grace peace and love,
Gia

don't sweat the small stuff

Yesterday, I was in Eleuthera. Rock Sound, Eleuthera to be exact. I was there for a couple hours, you know fly in the morning and leave that afternoon. I knew about the trip about a week in advance, but last week was fairly crazy and ultimately, I didn't get the opportunity to purchase my ticket until Friday. Upon arriving at travel agent, I was informed that the flight I needed to get on was full and it was only one flight into this particular town. Now, luckily for me (and my last minutedness), there are 3 airports on this island and the next airport had a flight leaving out 40 minutes later than the one I needed AND there was availability. YaY!! I quickly booked the flight and proceed on my merry way. There was some questions as to how I would get down to where I needed to be (which was an hour away) but I didn't really pay much attention to this. Small detail.

If you know me though, by now, I would normally be a bit on edge. One, I didn't get the flight I was supposed to get and then, I now had to figure out additional transportation arrangements. However, and I blame Daelyn Grace, I just didn't have the time or energy to stress about this (or other small stuff) now that she is here.  As a side note: if you know the islands, you know that most people there are genuinely friendly, cooperative, and accommodating. I was sure I could find a ride down (yes, possibly with a stranger) or worse case scenario, pay a taxi down.

I arrived at airport that morning at 6:15 (1 hr before scheduled departure time),  checked in and went about my business (still not very concerned). As I am boarding the flight, I learn that the flight I wanted/needed to be on was "cancelled" and those who had checked in, were re-routed to our location (on my flight). Upon arrival at our location, they would be transported by ground to Rock Sound.

Woohoo, I not only got to have an extra hour with my baby (who was up for feeding from 4:30-5:15 that morning) but now I even get transportation down to the town I needed to be in!!!

Ironically, the day got even more interesting as I somehow managed to travel on the wrong day. Seriously, don't ask me how I managed that. Once again though, I took it and kept on moving. It literally all worked out fairly seamslessly despite the fact that the school was expecting me later that week.

I not sure if I needed to travel that day or if God, in his great mercy, stepped in and worked out things on my behalf despite my flubbers. But as I moved through the day, I had a greater appreciation for how futile "worry" is in our lives. Had I gotten flustered from Friday with the first disappointing news, it would not have added anything to the overall experience. In fact, it would have taken away, as I probably would have expended so much energy that I would have been more tired.

As a Christian, reflecting on the past events, I couldn't help but think about the passage of scripture in Matthew 6 on worry. I went looking for it and found this very interesting translation. I don't even need to expound --its so easy to understand.

25-26 “If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds.

27-29 “Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them.

30-33 “If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

34 “Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.

Verse 34 is EVERYTHING. I'm gonna need to commit that to memory for the next time I decide to sweat the small (or even the big) stuff.

Grace peace and love,
Gia

I painted my toes!!!

slightly swollen feet WITH pretty toes!

Okay, so that's really not much to blog about BUT at 9 months pregnant...feeling like 12 months pregnant (doesn't really exist), I've got to celebrate the small stuff.

At first I was just excited to myself...but then as I thought more about the feat that is bending over and reaching ones toes with about a 6.5lb baby in your belly and said belly hindering every.single.movement....I had to share. :)

You see, just yesterday, while at church we were celebrating. Nothing in particular...just the goodness of God. We declared and reminded ourself that God is GOOD. We danced and jumped and had ourselves a good ole time. Well, "we" is a bit deceptive. I sat and watched and wished....I found myself even getting a bit sad in such a happy, celebratory atmosphere. So, I redirected my disappointment to thank God that I have full use of my feet even though the pressure from the pregnancy made using these feet a bit more cumbersome. I thanked God that I'm having a healthy pregnancy and despite the discomforts and limitations, that I am carrying a life...a miracle indeed. I thanked God that my voice and arms still worked and so with my voice I was able to sing and shout. With my arms, I was able to clap and wave. I continued this until I forgot that I wasn't able to physically "dance" but I was still praising...it turned out to be a half dance. You know the ones you do when you can't actually get up out your seat to bust a move but you are wiggling in your seat? yea - that!

In my reflections, I realized that its human nature to not miss something until its gone...or taken away from us. In this fast paced life, we tend to take most things for granted. Seriously, when was the last time you noticed that your fingers are agile and moving and respond at will for your to hold a pencil/pen, send a text or wave goodbye?

Its my challenge today..and particularly for the rest of this pregnancy (as I experience tons of discomfort) to remember all that I am blessed with...even as I may be slightly limited due to a rapidly growing human alien and uterus to accommodate this little alien! ;)


Grace peace and love (and pretty toes),
Gia

Rejected

As I spoke to my bestie one morning, she was relaying a story to me and the part that stuck out to me was a statement made...someone had commented that a particular church had a bunch of rejects and losers. The parent who made the statement was concerned about their child being in that atmosphere.

Now normally, I think I would have kinda agreed. You know after all, if an eagle is raised with chickens, it will be raised to NOT fly, even though its in the eagle's nature to not just fly but to soar. BUT rather than this thought, this scripture came to mind.

"The stone which the builders refused is become the head stone of the corner." -Psalm 118:22

And that began my musings for yesterday morning.

Our role model (if you are a Christian) is Jesus and He was the ultimate example of rejection (Isaiah 53:3). The "who's who" of that day literally called Him everything EXCEPT the son of God. It was even said that his authority was from the prince of demons (Matthew 9:34;12:22-25). And despite his humble beginnings, despite the fact that His own people rejected Him, despite the fact, that He really wasn't "much" as it relates to socio-economic status, the fact remains that this man was a revolutionary. Some 2000+ years later, his followers are still the largest group of all religious and/or civic groups. This rejected one, became the foundation, the head stone, by which Christianity was built.

If that revelation wasn't enough to keep me thinking, I then read this scripture in prayer later that evening:

"Behold! God is mighty, and yet despises no one nor regards anything as trivial; He is mighty in power of understanding and heart." - Job 36:5

So what's my point: There is a difference between those who are unmotivated, under-achieving, and settling for less than their potential (eagles with a chicken mentality) from those who may be in a particular position (e.g. temporarily unemployed, victim of abuse, divorced) and may not be of a "good" status by society's standards.  Both groups of people could be considered losers, and if we aren't careful, its easy to cast judgment, scorn, or fully reject them..

Does this mean that we have license to reject one while providing a pass for the other? NO! The MIGHTY God doesn't despise them, so why should we? I guess in the end, this post is a call to compassion, very similar to what I talked about last summer (see here).  A second or even third look at those who are different would go a long way for us as we manoeuvre through life and attempt to live it intentionally, purposefully, and with an impact beyond the grave. 

Grace, peace and love,
Gia

Note: I do apologize for the late entry and the missing entries- life is super hectic now and in prioritizing, blogging fell to the bottom of the list. Thanks for your patience. :)

Inner Beauty

I've had another opportunity to speak, this time it was less formal but the topic was important nonetheless...."Inner beauty".

I was amazed at what came up when I searched the topic, as it seems this topic has been dubbed "the thing you say if you are ugly or to ugly people". (insert blank stare here). I was wow'ed.

In any event, I felt as Christians our definition of inner beauty is wrapped up in the characteristics that make the Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). It was really cool to take it from this perspective because truly, the average person would consider another as "beautiful" if they are loving, kind, patient, good, etc etc etc.

The ah-ha moment for me as I prepared was that LOVE (greek: agape) was listed first and when we look at what it means to agape...well, we see the other characteristics of the fruit of the Spirit.

(1 Corinthians 13:3-7 MSG)

"So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.

Love never gives up. (faithfulness)

Love cares more for others than for self. (kindness)

Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. (peace)

Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, Doesn't force itself on others, (gentleness)

Isn't always "me first," (self-control/kindness)

Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, (long-suffering)

Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, (goodness/kindness)

Puts up with anything, (peace)

Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, (joy)

But keeps going to the end. "

I should note that Biblical joy (greek-chara) differs from happiness and has to do with gladness, contentment, and trust. It is stable unlike happiness which is dependent on circumstances. Joy is deeply rooted in a belief and understanding that God is ___________(you fill in the blank with whatever attribute is applicable for your situation). 

So essentially, my summary was that to be beautiful (inside) means that we agape our  family members, friends, coworkers....i.e. our neighbours!

If one was to ask about you- would you be described as beautiful inside and out?

Grace peace and love,
Gia

seed to the sower

I challenged you a couple weeks ago to pay it forward, I want to challenge you this week, to consider small ways to extend your hand, share your world and give to those less fortunate.

At the very core, I'm a sapp. compassionate. I'm the giver. I really don't care about making money as much as I want to give out money. And I definitely don't think about making money as much as I want to help people. Its not anything I'm sharing to boast about...in fact most people (including some in my inner circle) would consider me (or this philosophy) dumb or stupid and I can understand that.  A decade + some years ago, this desire was fostered in naivety  but now I think I've gotten a better understanding of the world to understand that...well essentially you can't give what you don't have! ;)

However, even in this lesson...I've learned some more. Even though I may not have, or may not be focused on having, the Word of God (which I live by) tells me that:

"10. For God is the one who provides seed for the farmer and then bread to eat. In the same way, he will provide and increase your resources and then produce a great harvest of generosity in you.

11 Yes, you will be enriched in every way so that you can always be generous. And when we take your gifts to those who need them, they will thank God. 12 So two good things will result from this ministry of giving—the needs of the believers in Jerusalem[f] will be met, and they will joyfully express their thanks to God." -2 Corinthians 9:10-12

Can you imagine how this made me smile?? Yes, I will still find practical ways to earn money, but at the end of the day...I know, if I am doing God's work, that He will make provision. He will provide me (the sower), with the seeds I need to plant. Of course, I can't just hold the seeds in my hand, because anyone, even us city folk, know that seeds do not grow in the palm of your hand. You need, at the very least...soil, water, and sunlight. At least I think that's the least of what we need...but you get the point.

This point was brought to life yesterday in Church as the minister sharing the Word talked about our dreams and gifts and our responsibility to not only dream, but to follow up with the dream (confronting our fears, mistrust, etc) and then finally to make the dream a reality...which of course requires practical funding. Without going into more details, she made a profound statement:

If you can hold it in your hand, it's not your harvest- it's your seed!!!

That shook me and reminded me, that what I have, what I earn, what I get excited about....is still merely just seed. I can plant it by blessing others, investing...sharing because when its harvest time, I will know. The barns will be overflowing. Literally.

For those of you who have followed this blog for a while, this is another example of Living on the Third River. woooot wooot. I thank God for reminding me and it is my prayer that I remain humble, pliable, and with an open hand that I may never covet the blessings I receive but share, knowing that I will help others and even through this act, will never be in lack.

What practical ways can you share, give, sow seed? food drive? packing old clothes and giving to homeless shelter? volunteering your time (which is money) to someone?

Grace peace and love,
Gia

Praise the GREAT God

"God has a first name—"Yahweh" or "Jehovah"—a Hebrew word that means, "I am." "Lord" should be translated "Jehovah," which means that Jehovah Almighty is His name. Jehovah is a personal name that reveals the very core of God's being, sufficiency, and holiness. God wants to be on a first name basis with us and wants us to come to Him just as we are, in our weakness and incompleteness. When we come before Him, sharing our deepest needs, with honesty and transparency, God then shares His last name, which is based on our current need in life."- Mary Sutherland, Girlfriends in God

Yesterday I had the humbling privilege of speaking in church for our Sunday morning service. Talk about nerve wracking. I've spoken on numerous occasions but in my head, there is something "different" about Sunday morning. Anyway...I talked about finding freedom. My message was entitled "Prison to Freedom, through Praise".



I wanted to share a short snippet of it on praise...and the quote from my GIG devotion this morning fit in so nicely.

Two things happen when we praise:

1. There is a shifting of our gaze (focus) to God: we become like Peter on the water...we can have the mental/emotional/spiritual and even physical strength to move out of the bondages [situations] that have already been unlocked and to move through the gates that have already been opened.
Also, praise helps us to re-align with God and to see a bit how God sees, that is...we get some insight into our situation AFTER we take our eyes off ourselves and look at God.

2. Through praise we establish, reiterate, remind ourselves of who God is, what He has done and what He is doing.

To praise means that we give commendation, accolades, honour to someone or something. We are highlighting a particular characteristic that we admire or like.  The act of praising means that there is a focus off of ourselves and onto the object receiving the praise.

When we praise God, I feel its easy to "get caught up". That is, to begin giving accolades about one characteristic and then easily be reminded that there is something else to give commendation to Him about.

For example, I can't help but to praise God for provision. He is Jehovah Nisse to me. There are so many situations where I know that it was Him who made the way...and in those situations, I can't help but think how He protected me and to be ever grateful that He is omniscient and loves me so much. So I praise Him for being Almighty God (El Shaddai), for being my protector and for being all-knowing (omniscient).  This then reminds me, that He sees everything...and particularly He sees me (El Roi) and my situation and He's working on my behalf. He is my Shepherd (Jehovah Rohi) and being the Good Shepherd, He will always lead me into truth and safety once I trust Him and I can always trust Him because He is faithful and GOOD!!!

Yes, its very easy to change our perspective from doom and gloom and despondency  to one where God becomes bigger and hope can rise and faith can be built!

Whatever your circumstance today, especially if its particularly heavy, sad, discouraging...shift your focus and begin to PRAISE. Recognize what God has already done, what He is doing and what He is about to do!

We were born to praise!

Grace peace and love,
Gia

celebration of life

As I somberly thought of what today represents, I was "awakened" to another perspective of death...as a "celebration of life".

And that is exactly what I reflected on in my quiet time this morning. Yes, the death of Christ is monumental.  It is through His dying, that we have life. It was the act of dying that He fulfilled the requirement, becoming the ultimate sacrifice so now we have salvation, grace, and mercy.

But before the death...there was the man.

I thought excitedly about how His life was exemplary. He came, giving up deity, taking on human flesh.  This meant He placed himself in a position to experience the hurts, pains, and even limitations of humanity.  But even more, He came and showed us how to live.

*I think of Cana - where water was turned into wine. A practical act, but yet supernatural (John 2:1-11).

*I think of Capernum - multiple healings of the sick and in particular the paralyzed man (Matt 8:16, Mark 1:32, Luke 4:40, Matthew 9:1-8, Mark 2:1-12, Luke 5:18-26). It was also in Capernum, where one of the first healings of demon possession occurred (Mark 1:21-28, Luke 4:33-37).

*I think of Bethsaida or thereabouts - where more than 5000 people were fed with 5 loaves and 2 fish. Another very practical act, born out of genuine care and compassion for people...but still supernatural (Matthew 14:13-21).

*I think of somewhere in Judea or therabouts- where people brought their children to Jesus, and through His actions and words, He affirmed and validated the life of children (Matthew 19:13-15).

*I think of Jesus, on his many journeys, how He not only affirmed and validated, but empowered so many who were outcast, sick or devalued, for example, the woman with the issue of blood (Luke 13:10-13), Zaccheus (Luke 19:1-10), selection of his disciples.

*and finally, I think of Gethsamene (Mount of Olives).  This place represented His prayer closet. So many times we see where Jesus went here for quiet time and communion with His Father.  But most difficult were the painful last moments where we really catch a glimpse into His humanity. Where He battled with the most difficult decision that was before Him. Whether or not, He would surrender to purpose and walk in God's will, which required that He not only die...but die a death of shame and gruesome pain. And then, even in these last moments, when He could have been so selfish and bitter and depressed...He still extended mercy and authority in the act of restoring the ear of one of the guards which was cut off by a zealous disciple (Luke 22:39-51).

This Good Friday is different. I will still humbly, solemnly remember...as I never want to forget what Jesus did on the Cross...but I also celebrate the life, the very full life that He lived.

The life that gives me an example of how to live:

compassionate, connected to the Father, practical in caring for the daily needs of others, merciful and nonjudgmental, respectful of everyone (child, orphan, widow, the marginalized) and finally, a life that is full of power and authority to walk in the supernatural, not just for show or for my personal gain, but for the sake of my brother and sister who need chains broken, who need to be healed, who needs a glimpse of Jesus.

Grace peace and love,
Gia

pay it forward!

Last week I spent some time in Canada. Sadly it will be my last visit for a lil while (about a year to be exact). I've gotten the green light to proceed with my dissertation (happy dance) and now, the rest is up to me... with the guidance, mentorship and assistance of an awesome committee with expertise who has made themselves available for assistance wherever possible.

Anyhoo, I digress. This post is about a small, yet cool incident that occurred on Sunday past. I was in the drive through line at Tim Hortons and felt this overwhelming need to "pay it forward".   You know,  leave something extra with the cashier for the person behind me.

I looked in my coin purse and found some extra coins (which of course in Canadian could be a lot of money since they've got $1 and $2 coins- not bills). I identified that I had an extra $2 and thought, "well that could cover up to one large coffee".   While ordering, I was asked if I wanted to upgrade for $.10 more  (mini size to small tea) and I was like..sure whatever.

Well, I left the extra $2 plus my change and indicated to the cashier that it was to go toward the next car's bill, he smiled at me almost knowingly (we were conspiring together).  I smiled at myself. Not in a prideful way, but in a feeling-very-fulfilled way. Yes, it was only $2 but I can't ever recall a time that I was not fulfilled doing something for someone else- especially if it was more "anonymous giving"!

I enjoyed my tea on my way to church and just as I was about to dispose of the remaining liquid and the cup, I remembered that Tim Hortons promotional Roll up the Rim was still going on and the reason I was offered to upgrade was to be eligible. Now I should note, I am one of those persons...you know, who never ever ever wins anything? Everything I've gotten has been either because of unmerited favor (not luck or chance) or because of my hard work. So I wasn't really feeling any particular pull to roll up the rim, but I did...to humor myself I guess. As I was about to toss the cup after rolling up the rim  without reading, just expecting the try again...

there it was "winner"!!!! whoaaaaa really???

It was a donut. I won a donut...valued at $.60 but a win nonetheless right? I immediately thought of my actions purchasing the tea and thought to myself "aint that something". Now I know that this win was all by chance...and my tea was given to me before I paid (or I think it was) so I won't go getting all super spiritual about it...but I definitely think this was a tangible reinforcement to make it  more likely that I do this again.  

I'm challenged to be more conscious about how regularly I "pay it forward". Now the thing is, to truly pay it forward, the recipient should be aware of the good act and their responsibility to pay it forward also so there is a chain of good deeds that starts to just double and triple...

But honestly even without the intentional act of creating the chain, I think we as humans have an inward wiring to want to do good, especially when we have been the recipients of a good act.

So...go forth and do something good, selfless, or an act of kindness today!

Grace peace and love,

Gia

Mrs. Fix-it-all?

I've been getting life lessons from everything recently. I'm not sure if this is greater sensitivity or my season of learning but I'm enjoying making the connections and walking away each day with something to chew on.

Most recent was during my TV viewing. For those of you who are CSI followers, you would know Sarah Sidle (2nd from left in picture). She has been a part of the Las Vegas team since the show's inception. Well in the past couple weeks, one of the episodes was focused on her. Now, for those who don't know, in the perfect world of CSI techs of Las Vegas, the evidence has always worked. It's always found the guilty even for the sharper of the criminals. And I mean, they have had some really smart ones pass through the various seasons.

So with this background, you would think that when she is the person looking guilty, the person of interest in a new investigation, that she would ultimately trust her own science. She has proven it over and over and over. In the world of this drama series, she has been a CSI FOR more than 10 years.

Well, now that her back is against the wall. She doesn't trust the science. Nor does it seem that she trust her colleagues who she has worked with for years; these skilled and sharp individuals who are always on the quest for truth. To make matters worse, in her trying to salvage herself, her reputation - she then decides to isolate herself from these people, who care...the sames ones who could [would] help her.

As I watched, the realization hit and I gasped audibly...wow. How much like me sometimes!

Many times has this been me. God has shown up over and over and over and yet when things get tough-I rush to try and fix things on my own. Only to learn that I can't.

I've done less and less of this over the years as I've grown and matured but don't believe for a second that it is easy to fully trust God to work things out.  After all, I'm the woman who always have the plan..well more accurately, I try to always have plans (plural)...that is, plan A, B & sometimes C.

I've got some more introspecting to do..to see if there are any situations currently that I have intercepted, rather than waiting and trusting God. A favorite scripture of mine, Psalm 46:10: Be still and know that I am God.

or as the amplified admonishes: "Let be and be still, and know (recognize and understand) that I am God."

One blogger commented: It is God's past that provides calm for our future. Essentially, that's what "being still" is about. It's not [always] a literal lack of physical movement..but a surrender of the heart. A recognition of our finite ability and God's infinite knowledge and ability. The fact that He is in control and working things out for our good.

Be encouraged...and in the moments of overwhelmedness..be still and remind yourself that God is still GOD.

Grace peace and love,
Gia

Back to the vision

I have alluded to the fact that I felt there was more work to be done as it relates to Mercy House Bahamas. I feel like God has expanded and tweaked what was the original design...

The expansion of this vision is nothing unique, in fact it looks a lot like a model that I've seen in S. Florida, however, the cool thing is that the model is fairly new to the Bahamas and furthermore, the specificity of the houses will fill great gaps that currently exist in our social welfare system.

In a nutshell, I see a group of homes that address needs of orphaned and homeless children and youth.  There is an introduction of levels of care which will ensure that kids who have greater needs are not just lumped together with those who may not need as much. This is for the protection of everyone involved, as we know some kids with greater challenges are likely to become perpetrators themselves.

At the crux of this vision is one word:

So for the past month or so, I've been just envisioning this place and I finally decided to draw it out. I couldn't draw...so I decided to use one of my fave presentation tools- Prezi.  If you click the work prezi, it should take you to the vision.

It's huge. I'm definitely looking for partners, sponsors, visionaries because some of the homes are without a "parent". That is, they need someone or a team of individuals to fully develop and take ownership within what it turning into a collective effort. I'm excited.

If you have any suggestions, comments or anything..please do share!

Grace peace and love,
Gia

blessed monday

Well this post isn't about a particular blessing that comes on Monday but that's just how I'm feeling this Monday. I'm keenly aware of how God has been keeping me, particularly as it relates to my finances and just wanted to give a lil praise report!

So as most of you realize, I'm home. That's the beautiful Nassau, Bahamas. The decision to spend this year here rather than finish in Canada was one that didn't come easy. While there were obvious benefits, for example, being with hubby...there were some other considerations. Yes it would be "cheaper" to be home..but would I be able to find gainful employment that is flexible and meaningful? Additionally  would I be able to find an internship that is meaningful and approved by the school?

Well, the decision to come home was made before the answers to  those questions materialized. I had prayed and prayed and prayed and felt that this is what God wanted for me. So in August 2012, I gave up my apartment as my first step and can I just say that it is all good.

Today, I'm boasting on God about the awesome 1/2 internship that I landed...lots of great experience and some good connections. And then there's the blessing of the part time job that I got. Did I mention that it is paying about equivalent to my previous full time position...say what? yes...HALLELUJAH!

It's that time for happy dance. Did I mention that both opportunities allows me so much flexibility that I can work from home on some days so there are no confinements of 9-5 which has somewhat become my nemesis.

For now, I'm sharing my story as a reminder that God is always faithful. His blessings abound where it is deserved and even when it may not be deserved. I was asked yesterday how did I figure God in this if it was my own hard work that secured these jobs..the thing is...the very breath I breathe belongs to God. The fact that I'm breathing is because of Him. The strength to work hard comes from Him..so does the wisdom and because I'm a praying kind of girl...most times the direction for where to go and when, comes from Him. So with all that in mind, I give Him the glory for the awesome job opportunities that HE provided, even if He didn't physically come down and give them to me.

Do you have a praise report for today?

Grace peace and love,
Gia

What's your story

I was having a conversation with friends from church and a number of times, the comment was made "that's not my story" or "that's not gonna be my story".

It made me think. This kind of statement wasn't necessarily in relation to the "big story", which is more of what I've talked about on this blog...you know, your legacy. It was more of the day to day experiences.  For examlple, I will not suffer with high blood pressure just because everyone else in my family does. This means we must take responsibility for our actions.  However, what it really tapped into was the fact that we have authority, through the power of our speech,  to accept or reject what is put before us. 

For those of us who are Christians, the Bible tells us that "life and death is in the power of the tongue". By virtue of our speech, we are creating (or destroying) quite a bit of what we experience in life. How does that look? For most of us, it means we either are so oblivious to this authority that we say nothing at all and just accept what comes our way or we are so caught up in the discourse of the rest of the world that we speak doom and gloom (death) upon our situations.

Nope. Now that's not gonna be MY story.

I shall speak Life. Hope. Restoration to every area of my life. I shall be different and unapologetically so.  I shall fulfill the small and large dreams in a timely fashion, if necessary, breaking glass ceilings of time, gender, race or age. I shall not settle for what typically happens, when I know what God has offered to me if I just ask and accept it.

Most salient at this point, I will not be like everyone else who has gone before me who took 2 years (plus or minus a couple months) to complete a dissertation. THAT's not gonna be my story. I'm not superwoman, nor will I submit anything subpar but I will complete this project and be ready for graduation for 2014. The journey un-officially began in Fall 2012, but technically the time clock probably won't begin until February 2013. At this point, my goal is June 2014 for graduation. I understand that there are some curve balls in life (which I am currently experiencing) so I'm willing to accept Fall 2014 graduation but I will be done with everything and just sitting and "waiting" by summer 2014.


There are other areas that I realized that I've been silent on. You know, I bought into this idea that since it is how it worked for others (or the masses), that it was how it should work for me. Nah. I'm taking stock in a new way and assessing those things that I've just thought to let be...

I'm boldly declaring, that's NOT gonna be MY story.

Grace peace and love,
Gia

Life as a puzzle

Every now and again, purpose would slap me upside my face and I'd smile because I realize this is a part of me emptying myself so that whenever it is my time to die, I know I would have fulfilled what God placed me on this Earth for.

So you may be asking, what exactly does "purpose slapping me upside my face" look like? 

It looks like my original plan for my dissertation being too big and my first draft falling flat. 

It looks like me taking a step back to my original plan and remembering that I wanted to explore life as an "orphan". 

It looks like me getting an opportunity to do some volunteer work (learned about this in November) with girls who are orphaned and me being over-the-moon excited about it. So excited, I was like..."why didn't I think of that"?  

It looks like me asking myself and then God, why is it that this group of individuals pulls to me the way they do. 

Then it looks like, a friend suggesting that I work with her to potentially counsel orphans (got this request last week).  By the way, the friend knew nothing of the changes to the dissertation which came in November, neither was she aware that I will be volunteering with this group for another project next weekend.  She just thought of me as an ideal person for the task at hand.

It is not by chance, or even not by my own doing that all of these opportunities are presenting themselves. This is purpose slapping me upside the face. I'm still waiting on the full "understanding" from God about the extent of my involvement (now and in the future) with this group of individuals. I've been even wondering if this is the direction for Mercy House (not first time I've had that thought either).

I love when it happens like this...just like the pieces of the puzzle of life coming together. Some people say they don't know what their purpose is. I believe that if we take 2nd and sometimes 3rd looks around us, we can see how our talents/passions can make a change.  We can also see how we are drawn to certain things, people or groups. Somehow, like me, it just so happens that multiple opportunities present itself over and over and so you find yourself doing something that you enjoy, and never actually pursued it. That's purpose slapping you over the head.

I was so taken with this post on JeremyStatton.com this morning, that I decided to just redirect my readers there....(click title below for full post). For me, the last bullet points (white background) just made my heart scream "YES!"

Excerpt taken from the post To die is to live. Enjoy.

"The point is to be fully alive.

• To focus on doing the things that will matter forever.
• To understand the value of time and stop wasting it.
• To silence distractions.
• To focus on relationships.
• To realize that some risks are too important not to take.
• To stop worrying about failing and to start doing.
• To love because in the end, there is nothing else."

Grace peace and love,
Gia

God I look to you

On Monday past, while I was thinking of all God has done, I couldn't help but fight the thoughts of what was still left to be done. I felt myself getting a bit twisted (code for stressed), so decided to shift back to my help. my source. [btw: I guess the emotional roller coaster from last week isn't quite done.]

I spoke out loud..."Lord I am looking to you and I will not allow myself to be overwhelmed."

With the declaration of that statement, this song came flooding back to me and I burst into song. For those of you who have NOT had the privilege to hear me sing, count yourself blessed! :) With the singing came the peace. Oh I long to live continuously with that sense of peace. Call me what you like, but I'll take peace over muscle spasms in my mouth (clenching & grinding my teeth) and/or shoulder aches that burn anyday.

Whatever the situation, whatever the calling --no matter how BIG....know that He is our rock (Psalm 91:2), He is our strength (Psalm 28:7/Isaiah 12:2), our peace (Ephesians 2:14/John 14:27), our joy (John 15:11). He is the God most high. We can put our belief, our faith, our trust in Him, knowing that He won't ever leave us nor will He let us down.


Grace peace and love,
Gia

Remaining focused

Last week was interesting. I got some indicators in the past month that my beloved and fairly new laptop was having some problems...one of which was "blue screen of death". After a quick google search last Monday, I realized that I needed to really investigate this matter. What I learned was that my hard drive was corrupted (?) I'm not sure if that was the term used, but regardless, I needed a new one....and fast before this unstable one crashed!

It is funny how, when you are stressed, how the smallest of things become major. Now, in all fairness, as a full time graduate student who is about to propose a dissertation based on research and courses from the past three years, (that are all stored on said computer), I think I legitimately had a reason to have a mini-freak out but I knew that this was so much more than that.

The very cool part of this week though, was the fact that I never once lost it. 

I began a journaling challenge about 3 weeks ago (Girlfriends in God).  Essentially, I record how God has shown up in my life each day [sudden glory moments] and since I began that, I've been more aware to ASK God to show up in specific areas. Then at the beginning of each day, I reflect and carefully review how God responded to each request from the previous day.

It also made me more aware of some moments as they are happening...I was able to smile and nod when I recognized God's hand in it. I was more aware to look for God showing up (remember my post about expectancy).  Those were the coolest...experiencing a "sudden glory moment" and recognizing it for what it is at that point.

This week was no different. As I learned more and more of what I was facing, I presented it to God each morning and asked for clarity.

Can I say, that each step of the way, I got answers. clearly. 

What it also did was minimize my anxiety about the challenge I was facing. I'll be honest and share that although it may have minimized anxiety about the computer situation, I still had other lessons to learn (part two to come)... In any event, the week was THAT much better because each day, I took my cares and requests to God and then looked for Him to show up and/or reveal the answer.

How was your week last week? Any lessons learned? Better yet...what were your glory moments?

Grace peace and love,
Gia

A hug from a stranger

There is something about when I'm "home". I somehow don't have a routine...part of it is because of the excitement of being home, another part is because of my husband's lack of a schedule and then,  because this is "home"- I guess my brain goes into a more relaxed, go-slow mode...not sure.

Anyway, I said all that to say that I've been having some difficulty with getting my regular Monday and Wednesday blog posts since I came home...and I think this lack of structure is the primary explanation. All excuses aside, I should get to the point of this post...

the impact of a small gesture.

About a month ago when I was in Canada, I experienced what I've been writing about. You know I'm the queen of encouraging all of us to give a smile, a hug, an extra word of encouragement...something to make someone's day. Well, it happened to me. And the weird part was: 1. I wasn't having a bad day and 2. It was in church.

Essentially, I'm just going about the routine of using the restroom after church before the long 45 minute drive home  and as I stand in line (because there is ALWAYS a line for women's restroom), this lady comes up to me and gives me a hug. Okay, so that's not weird...I am in church. That is expected. But what she did after is what shook me to the core and literally brought tears to my eyes..

she looked me in the eyes, told me that I looked beautiful and that God loves me.

I think she may have said something else but I need you to know it was not the words, I know I'm beautiful :)) and I KNOW that God loves me...it was the warmth, the intentionality, the "I see you"/"You are not invisible" nature of the act that still has me thinking of it and getting all warm inside because of it. It was love. It was genuine.

It took less than a minute for this woman to validate my humanity when for all intents and purposes, I didn't really think I needed validating at that moment...you know- it wasn't like it was a bad day or I was feeling exceptionally sad or lonely or anything..it was just a normal Sunday....

until she came along.

And THAT is what drives me. THAT gets me excited. THAT is what I want to do with everyone (or at least someone) each day:

Genuinely show the love of our Father, so the individual is validated, encouraged and rejuvenated.

I should note that apparently I wasn't her only victim. ;) Two awkward minutes later (as I stood fighting tears), this burly man comes lumbering over to her (as she too now waited in line for the restroom) and is literally gushing thanks. He was so overcome by her "genuine hug and kind words" that he had to come looking for her to tell her thanks.

That, my friends, is the love of God in action.

Have you had one of those experiences before? tell us about it!

Grace peace and love,
Gia

...in abundance and in famine

This post is somewhat of a part two and this was much harder than most because I'm being totally vulnerable here.

This lesson began a couple weeks ago (see here) and as the season of famine has continued, I have seen greater lessons for me. Nothing new or earth shattering mind you, simple truths I know but of course were challenged with life and my struggle to not only know of them (truth) but to live it!

Quick review: Earlier in this year, I was in abundance...full-time-student kind of abundance. I juggled 3 jobs and full time school (research, reading and writing) from January to about August and the cumulative pay was enough to cover all my expenses and then some...

End result: I was very proud of my savings. Not that I was boasting to anyone about it..no one really knew it existed but in my heart, I'd somehow (as I shared here) transferred my dependence from God to my savings.

Well as I shared a couple weeks ago, the savings had started to dwindle. What I didn't share was that was just one savings. (insert embarrassed face here). Yup. There was a back up savings to the savings...(I'm a girl-isn't there always?) And now that the savings is gone, the back up savings has dwindlied and once again, I felt the pinch (more like onslaught) of anxiety. It's crazy since I just went through this....

So yes, the lesson last time was that I had shifted my dependence and forgot WHO was my source. This time though, I recognized that the anxiety wasn't so much the fear that God wasn't providing (or wouldn't provide)....

I KNOW that God always comes through for me. Sometimes its really tight deadlines but nonetheless He comes through. ALWAYS. So in my quiet time, I tried to gain understanding that if I really do know and believe that He will come through...why am I still getting all bent out of shape....and there the realization slapped me in the face....I recognized the unspoken question that I was entertaining [subconsciously]:

What happens when it all runs out? 

Of course the "it" here is not my meager, barely-hitting-4figures-savings...

The IT here is God's provision. 

The continued lesson to this is a revelation of my own trust issues. ouch. [Now you understand why this is very hard to share]. I'm a Christian. I LOVE Jesus. I believe. But oh there is still some shaky ground to how I TRUST Him...more accurately, how much I trust His character, who He says He is.

Head knowledge dictates: He's the God of the Universe. His provision is the very air I breathe. So clearly it can't run out...but that doesn't stop the broken, scarred little person inside of me from questioning whether or not this is really true. :sigh:  

The cool thing as I wrote and reflect, is that this is what these lessons are about. Uncovering the holes and inconsistencies in my relationship with God and (re)surrendering my heart so that the relationship can be taken to another level.

I'm riding this out as I type...and I do not know what else this soul-searching will reveal but I'm here and I'm continuing on in the course. Rolling with the punches and extra careful to glean the lessons and whenever possible, share them with you. Humbly.

Grace peace and love,

Gia

Pressing on...

I'm tired....like not just the regular tired but sleepy. Hopefully I get a better night's rest tonight, but as I sat here looking at the computer screen and thought of what I wanted to "say" today, I was kinda blanking out.

So I sat here and reviewed my goals for this blog. I continued writing this blog  for the purpose of encouraging, uplifting and challenging my readers to live their best life. I'm about making a mark on this world through living a life that is purposeful and God-centered. If I could find 1,000 different ways to get across the importance of pursing passion and purpose, I would. :) I firmly believe it is the true secret to success and happiness that so many people long for.

Well...enough talking for today (you know I try to keep Fridays a light read).  Instead, I want you to tune in to short  interview which is a follow up on a series that my Pastor (featured) preached on last month called "Running to Win".

Enjoy

Grace peace and love,
Gia

Happy Thanksgiving (Canada)

Well, it is Thanksgiving in Canada and of course yesterday the sermon in Church centered around being grateful.

Pastor Rick at WCF, gave us three hallmarks of living that we should incorporate into our daily living (based off 1 Chronicles 16:4):
1. remember the blessings
2. give thanks
3. to praise or celebrate

These seem simple enough and without question, I know incorporating them into my daily routine, particularly as a substitute for complaining will reap great benefits. However, in my quiet time this morning, I thought about how "easy" (or not) this would be to do during the "winter" experiences and seasons of our life. You know, when it seems that nothing in life is going right, we are suffering a huge loss, grieving the death of a loved one, when the cupboards are bare, when the prognosis is negative, when our loved ones are acting the fool...yea the list can go on and on.

The thing I realized about these three steps is that they are actually in order. If you do not remember the blessings of yesterday (or even the blessings of today), it will be difficult for you to give thanks....and without both of these steps, what do you celebrate?

Some days I wish I had an opportunity to engage in the Jewish culture. I'm not sure how it works now with modern Jews, but the Bible tells us that they shared their stories with their kids. I imagine them all sitting around the elder of the family and listening to how God delivered their ancestors on the many different occasions. With those kinds of rituals, it's almost impossible to forget the blessings.



Let's take a second (or two) to reflect on everything you have. Now thank God for His provision and then Praise Him!

Today I remember:

• how much my parents sacrificed to get me a good education
• how God financially provided for two parents (no college degree) and for the most part minimum-wage jobs to maintain a household of 6 children...there was never a day where there wasn't food, clothing, shelter. We even had vacations!
• how God brought people in my life, in Minnesota, in West Palm and now...in Canada. People who have shared their lives, their houses/food/resources and their love to a [at first] stranger from the Bahamas.
• how we (my roomie and I) were kept safe on a roadtrip when we ignorantly jeopardized our own safety (read story here)
• how the supplies didn't run out and every child/family was blessed

The tears are streaming as I type and I want you to know, selecting these five experiences to remember was difficult because there has been so many times, where I have no doubt, it has been God's hand in my life, protecting me, providing for me and loving me. 

I'm going to need to save this, and of course add to it with all the other events, because I want to raise my future child(ren) on these stories. I want them to hear about how God is active and living today in their parents' lives, not only the awesome Bible stories.

Today I remember. I commit to remember, to be thankful and to celebrate because God has never once forgotten me. I feel it's only good manners that I graciously return the favor.

Grace peace and love,

Gia