seed to the sower

I challenged you a couple weeks ago to pay it forward, I want to challenge you this week, to consider small ways to extend your hand, share your world and give to those less fortunate.

At the very core, I'm a sapp. compassionate. I'm the giver. I really don't care about making money as much as I want to give out money. And I definitely don't think about making money as much as I want to help people. Its not anything I'm sharing to boast about...in fact most people (including some in my inner circle) would consider me (or this philosophy) dumb or stupid and I can understand that.  A decade + some years ago, this desire was fostered in naivety  but now I think I've gotten a better understanding of the world to understand that...well essentially you can't give what you don't have! ;)

However, even in this lesson...I've learned some more. Even though I may not have, or may not be focused on having, the Word of God (which I live by) tells me that:

"10. For God is the one who provides seed for the farmer and then bread to eat. In the same way, he will provide and increase your resources and then produce a great harvest of generosity in you.

11 Yes, you will be enriched in every way so that you can always be generous. And when we take your gifts to those who need them, they will thank God. 12 So two good things will result from this ministry of giving—the needs of the believers in Jerusalem[f] will be met, and they will joyfully express their thanks to God." -2 Corinthians 9:10-12

Can you imagine how this made me smile?? Yes, I will still find practical ways to earn money, but at the end of the day...I know, if I am doing God's work, that He will make provision. He will provide me (the sower), with the seeds I need to plant. Of course, I can't just hold the seeds in my hand, because anyone, even us city folk, know that seeds do not grow in the palm of your hand. You need, at the very least...soil, water, and sunlight. At least I think that's the least of what we need...but you get the point.

This point was brought to life yesterday in Church as the minister sharing the Word talked about our dreams and gifts and our responsibility to not only dream, but to follow up with the dream (confronting our fears, mistrust, etc) and then finally to make the dream a reality...which of course requires practical funding. Without going into more details, she made a profound statement:

If you can hold it in your hand, it's not your harvest- it's your seed!!!

That shook me and reminded me, that what I have, what I earn, what I get excited about....is still merely just seed. I can plant it by blessing others, investing...sharing because when its harvest time, I will know. The barns will be overflowing. Literally.

For those of you who have followed this blog for a while, this is another example of Living on the Third River. woooot wooot. I thank God for reminding me and it is my prayer that I remain humble, pliable, and with an open hand that I may never covet the blessings I receive but share, knowing that I will help others and even through this act, will never be in lack.

What practical ways can you share, give, sow seed? food drive? packing old clothes and giving to homeless shelter? volunteering your time (which is money) to someone?

Grace peace and love,
Gia

blessed monday

Well this post isn't about a particular blessing that comes on Monday but that's just how I'm feeling this Monday. I'm keenly aware of how God has been keeping me, particularly as it relates to my finances and just wanted to give a lil praise report!

So as most of you realize, I'm home. That's the beautiful Nassau, Bahamas. The decision to spend this year here rather than finish in Canada was one that didn't come easy. While there were obvious benefits, for example, being with hubby...there were some other considerations. Yes it would be "cheaper" to be home..but would I be able to find gainful employment that is flexible and meaningful? Additionally  would I be able to find an internship that is meaningful and approved by the school?

Well, the decision to come home was made before the answers to  those questions materialized. I had prayed and prayed and prayed and felt that this is what God wanted for me. So in August 2012, I gave up my apartment as my first step and can I just say that it is all good.

Today, I'm boasting on God about the awesome 1/2 internship that I landed...lots of great experience and some good connections. And then there's the blessing of the part time job that I got. Did I mention that it is paying about equivalent to my previous full time position...say what? yes...HALLELUJAH!

It's that time for happy dance. Did I mention that both opportunities allows me so much flexibility that I can work from home on some days so there are no confinements of 9-5 which has somewhat become my nemesis.

For now, I'm sharing my story as a reminder that God is always faithful. His blessings abound where it is deserved and even when it may not be deserved. I was asked yesterday how did I figure God in this if it was my own hard work that secured these jobs..the thing is...the very breath I breathe belongs to God. The fact that I'm breathing is because of Him. The strength to work hard comes from Him..so does the wisdom and because I'm a praying kind of girl...most times the direction for where to go and when, comes from Him. So with all that in mind, I give Him the glory for the awesome job opportunities that HE provided, even if He didn't physically come down and give them to me.

Do you have a praise report for today?

Grace peace and love,
Gia

...in abundance and in famine

This post is somewhat of a part two and this was much harder than most because I'm being totally vulnerable here.

This lesson began a couple weeks ago (see here) and as the season of famine has continued, I have seen greater lessons for me. Nothing new or earth shattering mind you, simple truths I know but of course were challenged with life and my struggle to not only know of them (truth) but to live it!

Quick review: Earlier in this year, I was in abundance...full-time-student kind of abundance. I juggled 3 jobs and full time school (research, reading and writing) from January to about August and the cumulative pay was enough to cover all my expenses and then some...

End result: I was very proud of my savings. Not that I was boasting to anyone about it..no one really knew it existed but in my heart, I'd somehow (as I shared here) transferred my dependence from God to my savings.

Well as I shared a couple weeks ago, the savings had started to dwindle. What I didn't share was that was just one savings. (insert embarrassed face here). Yup. There was a back up savings to the savings...(I'm a girl-isn't there always?) And now that the savings is gone, the back up savings has dwindlied and once again, I felt the pinch (more like onslaught) of anxiety. It's crazy since I just went through this....

So yes, the lesson last time was that I had shifted my dependence and forgot WHO was my source. This time though, I recognized that the anxiety wasn't so much the fear that God wasn't providing (or wouldn't provide)....

I KNOW that God always comes through for me. Sometimes its really tight deadlines but nonetheless He comes through. ALWAYS. So in my quiet time, I tried to gain understanding that if I really do know and believe that He will come through...why am I still getting all bent out of shape....and there the realization slapped me in the face....I recognized the unspoken question that I was entertaining [subconsciously]:

What happens when it all runs out? 

Of course the "it" here is not my meager, barely-hitting-4figures-savings...

The IT here is God's provision. 

The continued lesson to this is a revelation of my own trust issues. ouch. [Now you understand why this is very hard to share]. I'm a Christian. I LOVE Jesus. I believe. But oh there is still some shaky ground to how I TRUST Him...more accurately, how much I trust His character, who He says He is.

Head knowledge dictates: He's the God of the Universe. His provision is the very air I breathe. So clearly it can't run out...but that doesn't stop the broken, scarred little person inside of me from questioning whether or not this is really true. :sigh:  

The cool thing as I wrote and reflect, is that this is what these lessons are about. Uncovering the holes and inconsistencies in my relationship with God and (re)surrendering my heart so that the relationship can be taken to another level.

I'm riding this out as I type...and I do not know what else this soul-searching will reveal but I'm here and I'm continuing on in the course. Rolling with the punches and extra careful to glean the lessons and whenever possible, share them with you. Humbly.

Grace peace and love,

Gia

Provision

I want to briefly share this past week's experience with provision. I've talked enough about it, that you know I spent a week in Guyana and it really was not a cheap trip. I gave up some things and intentionally took a summer job just to be able to carry my own weight on the trip.

Well before that trip, I had a couple of jobs and life was good. I was living comfortably and creating a lovely savings for myself. What I didn't know was that God was setting me up for this season. So upon my return to Canada, which has really been less than 2 weeks, I've watched a fairly healthy savings (think full time student savings..not full time fancy profession savings :) ) just drizzle down to virtually nothing. It's not only basic needs but now my car is sucking the very life out of my financial existence.  Ironically, I now live 1 hour from school so a healthy, properly functioning car is not only a luxury but a NEED.

I began to get very sad...somehow I had begun to transfer my faith from God as my source, to the savings account as my source. After realizing this mistake, and getting things back in line, things took a completely different perspective. I began to really see how God was not only using my almost-depleted savings to help ensure my needs were covered but also other ways too.

I recall one particular day last week when the mechanic not only found me two slightly used tires for $90 (I was looking at $250 otherwise) but he also offered to fix my muffler ($500 job) on credit with the arrangement that I pay him in installments. Additionally, he went and fixed my hubcap on his own--glued it on so it didn't fall off on one of my journeys back and forth from school to home...

I need ya'll to know that I visit this particular auto shop, maybe once-twice a year and I don't know him from Adam. He does remember me and my husband from bringing the car over the past 3 years but somehow God has touched this man's heart to favour me so that I can be safe.

That same evening, I wanted to go to the grocery store but was tired and opted not to. Came home, checked the account, it was down to $20 so thought..hmm happy I was tired...I would have been sooo embarrassed if the debit transaction was declined. The thought crossed my mind about what would happen for food for the next couple days but I didn't worry about it.

A couple hours later, my roommie comes home with platters of food. SERIOUSLY. Platters. We definitely had enough food to keep us through the weekend and maybe even into early the following week if we creatively combined pieces to make meals.

Did I mention that this was the same day, hubby texted me that the scholarship cheque was ready? Praise Dance. Scholarship cheque means that every 2 weeks, I can get a couple dollars for the gas and food bill. This won't kick in until October but I'm not worried about the days in between. Praise Dance



It is all about where your eyes are focused. I could have easily missed these many instances of favour had I been all consumed with what was in my bank account..but re-fixing my eyes to Jesus who is the one who began and completes this faith journey, I am on....gave me a completely different outcome.

How has/is God provided(ing) in times of "lack"?


Grace peace and love,
Gia

Shrewd or fool?

This past week as I was MIA from blogging, I was busy getting those to-do's done (see here). One of them was getting the business license for It's Girl Time and planning the first paid event. woohooo! :D Throughout this week, there have been loose discussions about how I plan to make a profit. What kind of returns I'm looking to get..etc etc. And to be honest, I haven't been thinking that big for this business. I have so many other stuff to do, this is really a part-time, fun means for me to get a lil dollar here and there while also doing something that I love...planning, organizing and hosting events for little girls. Of course, being who I am, I couldn't just host parties, I had to add an extra "oomph" and I promise to share more about that in posts to come.

So back to the matter at hand - these conversations about profit and business etc. You should know that I am not a profit-driven business woman. It is what it is. I much prefer to give something away, to someone who needs, values or desires the product or service than to sell...especially to sell at a very hiked up price. If I can make $10 off of something I'm just as content as if I can make $50.  I consider it a strength and a weakness. [I know some people would suggest that I not be in "business" at all but I think there is a place for hearts like mine with a strong partner(s)/wise counsel ;)] With this in mind, as I planned the first event and provided the parents with a quote, I was strongly admonished that I didn't make sufficient profit off this event and if I really wanted to make money, I'm going to need to add a percentage or amount to each external vendor I use. Fine. I accepted that as wise counsel; I'm no dummy, I know I can't trade off items at cost and expect to make a profit, however the "problem" came about at the amount I was encouraged to add. I got a product for free, I passed it along to the customer for 1/4 of the cost, thinking I paid nothing for it so anything I charge is a "profit". What I charged ensures that all additional out-of-pocket expenses are now covered while still giving us a dollar to claim as profit. I felt I had heeded the previous advice given and was being a smart businesswoman. Apparently not; instead, I was advised that I should have charged full cost or very near to it. That bothered me...in fact it still bothers me. I try to be open to the advice of others and not be a know-it-all because I'm not. There are too many topics or situations that are completely novel to me. However, I've got a very healthy conscience that is guided/shaped by my personal convictions and it led me to begin to question where should the line between profit and killing the customer be drawn? What is fair and wise business ethics and what does the proverbially used car salesman look like in this line of business?

Oh, the joys of running a new business.

Last week sometime, in my personal devotion I read Psalm 37.

"It is better to be godly and have little than to be evil and rich. For the strength of the wicked will be shattered, but the Lord takes care of the godly. Day by day the Lord takes care of the innocent, and they will receive an inheritance that lasts forever. They will not be disgraced in hard times; even in famine they will have more than enough." Psalm 37: 16-19 NLT

You may be wondering what this have to do with my pricing dilemma? Well the reason I was instructed to "tax" the customers was to make a profit. The reason behind making a profit is to make money/get rich etc. However, the clash of beliefs come in that I don't believe the only way to become rich/live comfortably/make money is to make a profit. I believe that God is my financial source and He has a number of ways to ensure that I have all I need and even my wants (see here). Yes, making a profit is one way, but if this is to the harm of my "neighbors" (customers) then I believe it becomes wrong. On top of all this, as David so eloquently said in verse 25:

"Once I was young, and now I am old. Yet I have never seen the godly abandoned or their children begging for bread." Psalm 37: 25 NLT

It's only been 31 years I've been on this earth, 6 of which I have no recollection of, but I can truly attest to this verse above. Regardless of how bleak the situation looked: when daddy was not there and mommy was struggling alone with 3 kids; when blended family was created and two minimum wage parents had 6 dependents (all under the age of 14); when I was in the US at school...all 3 stories end the same way, I was never without. Someway, somehow "enough" came my way to ensure that whatever need was present - was met [legally].

So now stepping off of my soapbox and tying this all together. :) I think I had to have this conversation very early in the business life...Was all this necessary for this particular situation? Maybe not, but I think this was a lesson for me in defining what type of business person I will be, very early in this process. I needed this scenario and conversation to get my head in the right place, that is recognizing that my financial status is not limited to a profit from the customers of It's Girl Time. That I don't have to "kill" people to live, or even be successful. That I can be fair and still not "lose". God's always got my back. He is Jireh! With that said, [trying not to be holier-than-thou], I know that there is nothing wrong with earning a profit; I plan to. In fact, in order for the business to survive, we need to! There is also nothing wrong with marking up prices. However, for this business, mark ups will be added as deemed fair and not an opportunity to "get rich". When unique situations arise, as this one did, where we can provide a break to a person, we will determine what we need to break even, what we need to make a profit and will assess the final cost based on these factors. Basically, my motivation in pricing, will be fair and as much as possible, a win-win for us and for the customers.

Totally no judgment here. I'm not saying you have to run your business the same way. In fact, what would you do? Or for those of you who have already had situations like this- what have you done? Leave your responses below in the comments section. I look forward to hearing your thoughts, opinions, perspectives on this subject.

Grace peace and love,
Gia

Cultivating a grateful spirit

A couple days ago, I had another small 'life lesson'...As I mentioned previously, my life goal is to reside in a place where I am not afraid, worried or the least bit concerned about sharing what I have with others because I am cognizant of who I am (child of the King) and ALL I have access to. In other words, there is no need for stingyness.

Now this may sound very noble, but until recently, I lived in almost the opposite manner. My attitude was that I needed to be cautious with what I had (and how I shared it out), because I had to store up for a "dry day". You know, that day in the foreseen future when I may find myself with nothing...and at this point, when I have nothing (or run out) I can dig in my closet/pocket/refrigerator and pull out the life-line! Without getting too "holier-than-thou", this kind of thinking is quite Anti-Christian considering I am professing to serve the God of the Universe. The Creator, the One who owns all and is above all. After all, He is the One who "owns the cattle on a thousand hills" (commonly quoted scripture -Psalm 50:10).

Anyway, to the story: I am at work (summer job that I am grateful for) and it is lunch time. I only prepared sufficient lunch for one person (me) and the typical Gia does not share food. I just don't. I'm always hungry and when I get full, I feel the need to save what I don't eat...for that next moment of hunger. Anyhoo, without even being asked (or thinking twice), I offer my plate to a friend for her to share my meal. I knew that after sharing, I was probably going to still be hungry but it just wasn't that big of a deal. [Side note: Thank God for growth in seemingly small areas.] Anyway, less than 1/2 hour after eating my share of the food, I get a call to come for food. And not just any food...some good good yummy Bahamian food. As I returned to my desk with the food in my hand, I could only smile to myself and say "Thank You Lord". The story doesn't stop there, an hour later, I get another call...and I am invited to join in a mini-feast with dessert!

On this Thankful Thursday, I am grateful for the abundance of food...I have food in my fridge and cupboards and  beyond that, I have access to places (restaurants, grocery store, semi-fertile land) that I can obtain nourishing food from. I also commit to continue to cultivate an attitude of gratefulness and maintain an open hand so that for every blessing I receive, I freely give!

I am definitely a work in progress in so many areas, but it feels good when I get it "right"...cause I know when I do, I make God smile and that makes me giddy on the inside. :-)

Grace peace and love,
Gia

Prayer without expectancy = unbelief

I stumbled upon this quote in my journal this morning and smiled because over the weekend, I was faced with this reality...the reality that I sometimes pray, asking for various things and somehow still do not EXPECT God to answer the prayer.

As I am a big proponent for self-development, I consciously make an effort to identify areas of my life to work on. This is an ongoing thing...one of my personal values is that if I am living, I am growing (not just physically but in every aspect I can). Typically it is through various situations, that I am able to identify my "growth areas". One of the growth areas for this year, has been about being a good steward of my finances. I took it a bit further after reading a book, Living on the Third River, and asked God to literally stretch me in the area of giving so I can truly become a conduit as it relates to my finances.

This past weekend, while in Chicago, I visited an awesome ministry, All Nations Worship Assembly, and while there are literally about 4 blog posts from my experience there, the one for this post, had to do with giving. At one point in the service, toward the end (I think) the minister said (paraphrase): "I declare that we will be without lack, that we will stumble upon money, we will open wallets/drawers and find money that we didn't know we had...we would open our car doors and look down and find bills..." you get the point.

My response: an emphatic "Wooooo yes Lord, Amen!" in agreement with the declaration that the minister made. 

Fast forward about 3 hours later, I am at lunch with a fellow Bahamian who attends that church while my friend attended the wedding (reason for the road trip) and this is where the "object lesson" began. So even as I had come into agreement less than 5 hrs previously, I call shame on myself for literally being surprised when I stumbled upon $20 in my wallet! :gasp: This, unfortunately, was after I had already had to use my credit card to pay for my food, since the bill was slightly more than the cash I had. Nevertheless, I quickly thanked God for the blessing and left it in my wallet, smiling to myself about how amazing my God is. In line with my submission to being a conduit with my finances, this Third River living, God quickly provided me with an opportunity to bless someone else with my blessing.

Without going into detail of that story, let’s just say that I was obedient.....and then it happened again (twice). This is how the scenario unfolded- I checked my wallet, accounted for the bill(s) inside, only to open it again at a later point (the same wallet) and find another bill added to what I had previously seen. Woah!!! It could be that I can't count or I am careless but I honestly think this an object lesson that God has allowed as it relates to asking with expectancy, particularly since there are a couple of big ticket requests (well big ticket to me) that I have made and have been struggling with the how and if "it" will come.  Nonetheless, by the second incident, I began praying (and continue to do so), that my faith would increase, and with it, my sense of expectancy as I pray, so that I will not be surprised when God answers but just grateful for His provision and faithfulness.

I encourage you to take inventory of your expectancy level toward the prayers you have surrendered. Have you asked and forgotten to look out for the answer/response/blessing? Have you asked as the "thing to do" as a Christian but do not truly believe? In the spirit of transparency, I had to revisit my request (you can find the story here) and assess what my expectancy level is. Am I really waiting to receive the blessing of the funds needed to get Mercy House a formally established non-profit organization in the Commonwealth of the Bahamas? Not sure what my answer was last week…but now it is a  "Wooooo yes Lord, Amen!"

There is so much more to be said as it relates to financial stewardship and the like as I continue to trust God and grow in this specific area but this is it for now...

Grace, peace and love,

Gia