it's been too long

So I'm still alive.

In the last post, you got how VERY pregnant I was and my new found need to be grateful in the small things. Although painting my toes was a huge deal. lol

Anyway, the past week has been quite interesting. I learned that my little alien is really a chunky monkey with a really big head. I also learned that because of this, what we could call "natural" delivery is a challenge and since then, there has been tons of conversations as I prayed, sought counsel and just tried to "be" with this reality. The "reality" is that having baby via c-section is, according to doctor, the most ideal scenario.

To this end, roller coaster is probably a great way to describe the past week. I'm not opposed to c-sections but I was not prepared to have one personally. Even though D-day (i.e. the day that Daelyn arrives) could be less than 24 hrs away as I'm to be admitted into hospital tomorrow morning with the sunrise, I'm okay with it as an option but still not okay with it...if that makes sense.

Without belaboring the point that probably have no relevance to many of you who are reading, this post is about two things:

1. To officially let you know that I'll be on baby sabbatical beginning now and

2. To just encourage you to know what you want in life. That's an odd point to make and leave so I'll expound a bit before saying adieu.

Because I knew what I wanted as it relates to this pregnancy and more importantly to the labor and delivery experience, I was able to advocate for myself. As my doctor joked yesterday, apparently I read too much. Essentially, even though it was quite scary to say so---I was able to stand my ground and say "slow down, not yet".

For those who don't know me personally, I'm not one to ever question or rebel against authority. I'm a rule-keeper (as compared to my hubby who by nature seems to be a rule-breaker or at the very least a rule-challenger). So with my doctor, who I trust, suggesting...almost requiring one course of action - this put me in a very precarious situation as I said.."not yet". I asked for time. And although she wasn't happy- I got the time I asked for.

During that time, I read, prayed, consulted, prayed, talked...yea you get the point. I found peace with a decision and I'm proud to say, this decision is based on my original desires and has been accepted as a viable course of action for me by the doctor.

For some of you, this process may have been easier...but this was a big step for me. Advocating for my own wants. Somehow it tends to be easier for me to do that for others but I'm proud that I've made this step. However the cookie crumbles tomorrow, I'll know that I didn't just go along with a recommendation or suggestion without question. I took time to question, seek counsel, think, pray...I then challenged and found a happy medium!

As you go about your day tomorrow, send positive thoughts and prayers my way on my D-day!

Grace peace and love,
Gia